Better stick with the $20 or $100 bills:
A Georgia woman who tried to use a fake $1 million bill to buy $1,675 worth of merchandise at Wal-Mart was arrested, and police later found two more of the bills in her purse.
. . .
A store clerk immediately noticed the bill was fake when 35-year-old Alice Regina Pike handed it to her on Friday, Cotton said.
Pike then tried to use two gift cards worth only $2.32 to buy the merchandise, but when that did not work she again asked to cash the $1 million bill, Cotton said. The store then called police.
Can I get my $998,325 in change?
Oh my. Whenever I start to think there may be hope for society, I always hear stories about idiots like this to bring me back to earth.