Washington Memo

To: United States Congress
From: Dick Cheney President George W. Bush
Date: 13 May 2004
RE: Funding Request
Members of Congress:
Please help me win our crusade against the evildoers by appropriating another $25 billion according to the detailed schedule below:
$14 billion supporting our troops +
$11 billion bringing freedom to the Iraqi people
————
$25 billion
Thanks.
George W. Bush
P.S. May God continue to bless America.

Abu Ghraib Sex Shows

A handful of bad soldiers:

Sex and alcoholism were commonplace among guards at Iraq’s Abu Ghraib prison even though they were forbidden, and soldiers set up a candle-lit room for sex shows, US troops who served there say.
“There was lots of affairs. There was all kinds of adultery and alcoholism and all kinds of crap going on,” said Dave Bischel, a National Guardsman with the 870th Military Police unit who returned home last month after service at Abu Ghraib.
“There was a bed found in one of the abandoned buildings, there was a mattress on the ground, they had chairs all circled around it and candles all over the place,” he said. “Chairs (were) around it obviously for an audience.”

I blame William Jefferson Clinton. His escapade with Monica while commander in chief generated the sexual permissiveness in today’s military. We’re lucky we have George W. Bush as president to clean things up.
[/right wing radio]

War Crimes Suit

This is something literary types might call ironic:

VETERAN French lawyer Jacques Verges will today file a war crimes suit against Britain at the International Criminal Court in The Hague.
Mr Verges, who says he has been asked to act for former Iraqi president Saddam Hussein, said the suit would be on behalf of “the families of prisoners of the coalition in which Britain participates”.